Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Momma Bear asks Whaaaat????

Unknown to me, Missy was given a developmental screening when she was first put in daycare . This is a routine procedure when a child is in the School Readiness Program.
Today I got the Assessment. 

It shows that my little angel is lacking in the following skills:

1. Communication
    Seriously? Missy "talks" all the time!  I understand her quite well. If she doesn't have the "words" she definitely cries till we figure it out.

2. Problem Solving
  I really don't understand....She seems very intelligent to me and maybe someone doesn't know what they are doing.

Isn't that just like a momma?   That's not my kid, you must be mistaken.  Momma Bear coming out....

 I can't believe I fell into that mindset.  Me, the veteran mom of 37 years. 

Upon stepping back and looking objectively at the assessment I realize how right it was, spot on actually.  Yes, Missy talks, but communication.....well, she gets what she want, it's true, but because we are at her beck and call. We don't really give her the option of TELLING us, we just get a different thing until she's happy.  This is something that we really need to work on. We need to give Missy the skills to communicate, grow and blossom in this world. 

And problem solving....
I really struggled with this one.  Ask anyone who knows her and they will tell you how smart Missy is.  I just couldn't understand but upon further thought, I realized that she solves most problems with brute force.  We will work on this too.

Sometimes you have to step back and look at the situation with the eyes of an outsider and that's what I had to do today.

Tuesday, June 19, 2012

My little head-banger

Missy continues to bang her head on the tile floors, kitchen cabinets, walls, etc. I have talked to our FDS, GAL and CM.  I also spoke to her mother and asked if she has ever done this before. I was told that she had "just started" before the state "took her away".  Mom is sure it has to do with being taken and that when  it happened in her custody was "just a fluke".  Either way, it's very concerning as I am afraid that she will hurt herself. It doesn't seem to phase her at all. Sometimes she even acts like it feels good.  Most time it's when she seems frustrated but at other times she seems to do it for no other reason that she WANTS to.

I got a referral from Missy's primary care doctor today to see a Neurologist.  I'm interested in seeing what he/she says about this.

Saturday, June 2, 2012

Foster Speak.....or what does that MEAN?

I have had people ask me what different "foster words" mean.  Here is a list of common acronyms and words you will hear in my posts.  By no means are these universal....some are but lots are my own....
I read several other foster momma blogs and a lot are common.
In no certain order....because that's the way my brain functions:

CM......Case Manager, Care Manager, Case Management....all the same thing, it is the person, or persons who work for the state. They manager the case.....duh

GAL, Guardian Ad Litem....A person appointed to be the voice for the children.  Most are unpaid volunteers

CPI....Child Protection Investigator or Child Protection Investigation..This is the agency that ensures that children are not abused or neglected.  Typically (at least in our case) a CPI (investigator) brings a foster child to your home the first time.

Transport...short for transporter...the person to drives a child to and from visits or other functions..sometimes transport supervises visits

FP....foster parent

Group Home.....

FDS, Family Development Specialist...A person from your licensing agency who "has your back", your "go to person"....any problems at all with the children or your CM and they will help intervene.

Licensing Agency....they license you for foster care, they do your home study, provide training and continuing education. They support you through your fostering journey.

Independent Living Counselor..... ( I copied and pasted this from their website, since I have yet to deal with them--I will update when I have personal information)
Adolescents face a range of developmental issues, and as teens approach adulthood, living independently becomes a significant goal. While youth with intact families may struggle to achieve self-reliance, youth in out-of-home care face formidable obstacles. The counselor will provide resources and program to help them achieve independent  living.

FK...foster kid   or FB...foster baby

I'm sure as the time goes on, I will encounter more and I will update this page as I learn new things.  I'm new at this too, so we can learn together.